Odd News in the Woman's Life

I am now officially a member of a homemaker's group, and I like it. Seemingly, I have completely shed everything that was youthful and fancy-free so that I can bake casseroles and delicate, ladylike desserts. We meet at each other's homes and spend an evening eating and chatting. Sometimes, it's gossiping. We small group of neighbors have now forged a semi-secret society. Now, our waves of hello have actual meaning to them. Cool.

Wildlife

Wildlife, oh wildlife, why do you invade my kitchen?
Stinkbugs, you do not belong here.
Moths, you either.
And fruit-flies, what do you want from me? I'm neither sweet nor nectar-filled.
Be forewarned: if I find you, I will squash you, except for you, stinkbug,
For everyone tells me you stink, but I've never noticed.
You just keep me awake at night with your clumsy efforts to fly in confined spaces.
Nevertheless, I can't stand any of you.
Go away.

The Pledge of Allegiance

In Bubby's own words:

I pedge aweegance to the flag
Of the United States of Amerwica
And to the wee public for witch it stands (picture a tiny public at Halloween time)
One nation under God
Inbibbable
Wiff wiberty (smell good?)
And justice
For all.